When I turned 29 last year, I wanted to give a polite “UP yours” to every person who implied that 29 was getting old– that I should really enjoy it because “in one year it’s over!”
Ummm… eff that. WHAT is over? The crippling self-consciousness that comes with being in your 20s? The feeling of obligation to waste time entertaining relationships that are really no more than acquaintances? Career wise- having to prove yourself extra hard to dispel the immediate you’re-in-your-20s-you’re-an-
OKAY COOL! Good riddance!
Surely they don’t mean the fun is over after 30. Our idea of fun will continue to evolve throughout life, and thank G! Because if it didn’t, things would get static… and that’s boring.
And surely they don’t mean you have to stop going out and being SOCIAL after 30. If women over 30 stopped going out, bars and venues would see a significant decrease in revenue. They’d plead to have them back.
I see the 30’s as a very sexy, social time to look forward to. When we go out, for instance, we’ll probably make better drunk decisions because we’ll have some extra wisdom. We’ll drink better liquor. We’ll be surrounded by fun-loving, handsome grown men instead of these ManBoy Frat-heads in tank tops pounding shots. We’ll toast to our career advancements, to good things happening in the world… rather than just “IT’S FRIDAY NIGHT BITCHES! DRINK!”
So we might not go OUT out as frequently as we get older, but that’s not because we can’t or we’re not welcome (obviously we are) but more-so because our idea of fun will shift. We will start to take pleasure in other ways to spend our time.
At 29, I’ll hit the town for a night out with my girlfriends at the drop of a hat if they ask me- because it means quality time together that we don’t always get. But I will not go out just to “go out” anymore. There’s gotta be a purpose. And that’s alllllll good. Ladies, we can honor our learned (or earned?) wisdom and have fun simultaneously. You don’t just have to pick one. You can have as much of a social life as you like, no matter the age! I know so many women in their 30s with a hot social life. They’re responsible, productive, respected…and STILL GO OUT! Some of them are married too! Or have kids. They find a way!
Now let’s talk about looks. Are you going to start getting some fine lines in your late twenties/early 30s? YEP. But who cares? It does not mean you don’t still got it. It doesn’t mean you’re “not as pretty” as you once were. You’re going to look mostly the same for a longgggg time. Just take care of yourself. Do whatever you can (or hell- just whatever you want to) for prevention. Whether you’re pulling out all the stops or not doing a damn thing… it doesn’t matter, just don’t obsess. It’s not good for you. Myself.. I’m a freaking NUT about my skin. But even as I take preventative measures, I know that unless I die early, the years WILL keep coming and I WILL age. But it’s slowly!! It’s never overnight! And I don’t mind it! Bring it on, life!
Technically, you could actually get better looking in your 30s. Especially if you were hard on your body in your 20s. You can up your workout game more than you ever did in your 20s. You can try to do your makeup better. Shape your brows better, dress more flattering– I don’t know! But we can always improve if we really want to. But you know what? As I type this, I’m wondering out loud, does it really matter? It doesn’t. It’s kinda shallow thinking. Just wanted to reiterate that it doesn’t all go out the window at a certain age.
And look at it this way: the added confidence that comes with your late 20s and 30s pretty much equals you out to your prior early/mid 20s “perfect” self– because chances are your ass was way more insecure then. Insecurity ain’t pretty. Confidence, though, that’s sooooo sexy. And confidence knows no age.
An aging Woman is damn beautiful. Especially if she welcomes it and just owns?that ish. *Insert girl in red dress emoji*
Next up, let’s discuss the metabolism. Sure, it begins to slow a bit… but if you’re exercising and eating healthy then you’ll be fine! FINE! I promise. Eating healthy and exercising is something we should be trying to do anyway, right? So what’s the big deal? Better for your body’s functionality anyway. Even ultra skinny 21ers shouldn’t be eating crap. If you’re finding you have to work harder to keep your figure then, hey.. just do it. It really ain’t that bad. OR embrace some extra curves! Va va voom baby! Why not? Maybe you’ll feel more confident with extra curves or softness! Just talk kindly to yourself. Your body is a warrior tank of vitality- treat it with love!
Don’t let a few MINOR wrinkles and a slightly slower metabolism make you think you’re old. The body is always in flux and in your early and even mid 30s, your body is still relatively young. And the mind is young forever! As my Mom always tells me, “I’m 67 and I don’t feel old!”
Even Erik Erikson (famed developmental psychologist) says young adulthood is 19-40. FORTY!
Psychologist Carl Jung (whom we can thank for the Meyrs Briggs personality test) states that around age 30 is when we begin to focus less on personal concerns such as materialism and sexuality and more on collective concerns such as humanity and community. Personally, I think that’s a good thing. He also believes that if we just acknowledge that shift and don’t try to fight it, we shouldn’t feel so neurotic and worried about getting older. And again, “getting older” doesn’t mean “old.”
And if after allllll this you’re still worried about getting older, look at the following celebrities in their FORTIES and beyond. Obviously, their accomplishments are 374328X more important than their looks but since we already went there, may I present to you:
DA DA DA DA, DA DA DA DA?DAMN!
Your time is not running out. Let yourselves relax! We cannot have our Queens of the world running around stressed over something so silly and out of their control!
So Babetown! Listen up. Let’s focus on confidence, health and happiness first and we will shine no matter the age. Sounds cliche but that shit is TRUE. Cheers to the female rebels of every age. I’ve heard the real fun starts after 60 anyway. 😉